Wives often Lie to their Husbands, and Husbands to their Wives

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Cheon Seong Gyeong 1913

I have been speaking about the hobby business. The entire world today is a world of science, in which through the best technology, people are moving the world. For this reason, people take a serious view of the production process, calling it the hobby industry, whereas I call it the hobby life. Do you understand? There are all kinds of hobbies – hobbies for your eyes, for your nose, for your mouth, for your ears, for your sense of touch, for your body, for your mind, for your love, and so on… (278-95, 1996.5.1)

Cheon Seong Gyeong 989

Section 1. Living in Attendance of God
1.1. God and human beings relate as parent and child

Among all bonds of relationships, the standard is the parent-child relationship established between God and human beings. The heart coming from this bond cannot be undermined by the authority of any being and is eternal, unchanging, and unique. The authority of this heart is also absolute. For this reason, when you come forth with this authority, all existing beings will bow their heads before you. When you move with the authority of that heart, the entire universe must follow you. This is the ironclad rule of the universe. (7-105, 1959.7.26)



Ethics of Married Life

3. The Good and the Bad in Husbands and Wives 

Teachings of Rev. Sun Myung Moon

What is the problem with families today? Isn’t it that both the husband and wife are insisting, “Live for my sake” and “You must love only me”? Such a selfish attitude is the characteristic of Satan, so God will leave such a family. Once Satan enters a family, it breaks down. The parents raise the children, insisting, “You must live for us.” The children tell their parents, “Father, mother, live for me.” They each want the other to live for their sake, so the family breaks apart. (69:87, October 20, 1973)

Wives often lie to their husbands, and husbands to their wives, in order to hide things from each other. Each tries to possess a realm over which they have sole control. If your family is like this, you are still connected with Satan’s world. (396:257, November 10, 2002)

When a wife suggests to her husband, “Please do this,” he answers, “Yes.” When the husband suggests to his wife, “Please do this,” she answers, “Yes.” Is it right when a husband and wife obey each other like that?… Should the central point of a marriage be the husband, the wife, or their love? It should be love. (91:220, February 20, 1977)

It is not easy being a husband. Although you come home tired from work, you still have responsibilities toward your wife. Although your work was full of difficulties and aggravations, you still have responsibilities toward your wife. The greater the difficulties, the greater are your responsibilities toward your wife. The fact that you are tired is no excuse.
    The same is true for you wives. It does not matter whether you like your husband or do not like your husband; you still have responsibilities toward him. The basic rule is joint responsibility.
    Your spouse stands before you as God’s representative on earth. He or she is in a unique position as God’s representative, more than any other person in the nation or any other person on earth. Husbands and wives who have thoughts other than this while they live on earth will go to a fearful hell.
    Likewise, as parents, you have to be careful that you never cause your children to say, “Our mother and father are always fighting.” If your children see you like that, then regardless of how well you do otherwise, you will end up in hell. Rather, you should act in such a way that your children say, “Our father represents God. He is God in our home. Our father is our home’s president. Our father is our home’s saint.” They should say the same things about their mother. The sages of old had a saying, “All is well when there is harmony at home.” In the Unification Church, we go a step further and call for “harmony with Heaven.” We must create harmony with Heaven everywhere in the cosmos. (101:41-42, October 28, 1978)

A woman who sometimes gets hysterical, crying, “Eeek!” needs a mate who can comprehend her ways. When she gets upset at her husband, calling, “John!” he should calmly reply, “Oh, yes?” He should not snap back at her, “What do you want now?” Instead he should take his time, slowly turn to face her, and say, “Yessss?” [making a face].
    The rockiest and steepest mountain has the loudest and strongest echo. When you shout at it, “Bee!” the mountain answers with a resounding “Boo-oom.” A husband should give that kind of echo to his wife. When his wife nags him, “Ng, ng, ng,” he responds, “umm, umm, ummmm.” A true man has such a nature, something that is mysterious to his wife. He should be different from her and not just react to whatever she says. (118:225-26, June 6, 1982)

When a husband and wife have separate bank accounts and say, “This is my money and that is your money,” is that perfect love? Perfect love goes beyond this and says, “My money is as much yours as it is mine.”
    Would you want to set preconditions on your partner before you get married, or would you ask only for love? Does a person who requires his or her partner to sign a prenuptial agreement really trying to love or just pretending to love? Perhaps he or she is using love.
    That is not our way; we should live for love. Marriage means gathering together all your power, knowledge, money, and yourself, and putting everything in one package to present to your husband, asking only for his love in return. (92:192, April 10, 1977)

When a true husband or true wife encounters difficulties, he or she does not weep and complain, “Because of that terrible husband…” or “because of that terrible wife, I am ruined.” Instead, they weep repentant tears, saying, “Because I was lacking in devotion, I could not make my husband happy,” or “I could not make my wife happy.” The husband and wife who live together in this manner are a true husband and a true wife. (204:41, June 29, 1990)

Who is a true wife? A true wife determines that she was born for her husband, lives for him and would die for him. Only in that place, can she be a true wife.
    Who is a true husband? A true husband determines that he was born for his wife, lives for her and would die for her. The ideal of God’s creation lies in this, though most people don’t realize it.
    As we practice this, we come to understand the principle: We exist to live for the sake of others. Only by living in this manner can we find true love. Since God set up this principle, it is the only path for humans to find happiness and hope. (77:293, April 25, 1975)

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